30 June 2009

Death of a Legend: The Nail Art

(this is an ongoing post and so far this is the 2nd part. The first part can be found here and is called, "Death of a Legend: The Reaction")

Remember the "glove"? Well of course you do. What started out as a ploy to cover up the beginning stages of virtiligo disease, very quickly became a trend in the fashion world. And no one but Mike could pull it off so fashionably.

I never had a glove though. Or a red leather jacket like his.

So instead, I did my nails (mani and pedi) in honor of the King.
Here are my nails (hand):


Ehn...I'm not too confident about the pedi pics. The pedi is dope...but the pics didn't come out right for some reason. Either way.....they are reminiscent to that of his jacket. The jacket from "Beat It" and "Thriller":

Next blog: "Death of a Legend: Respect the Legacy" will be up either today or within the next few days.

Death of a Legend: The Reaction

(This will be an ongoing post)

I sat around and mulled around trying to find the words. I was in denial for a day and a half, kept looking at his videos and listening to his music so heavily he was in my dreams and when I awoke, a different song of his would be in my head..... "Billy Jean"..."Leave Me Alone"...."Scream"....and "Smooth Criminal". I didn't "accept" it til Sunday. Then I said I'd write....because it's only right.


Every time I attempted to put pen to pad, I came up short. Like him, I'm a perfectionist to the nth degree. I wanted it to be right. I also know that I have too much in my head for just a lone blog.

But what do I say? Something other than "RIP" has to suffice. All perceived "dramatics" aside, I took his passing to the head, heart, and soul of me. Those who know me know that I took it nearly as hard as one of my own relatives passing. I was shocked, depressed, and sad. He has always been with me. I was heavily exposed to ALL of his works. Sure enough, I didn't know him personally, however with him being in the limelight for more than 90% of his life, I felt like I knew him. He was like a talented older brother to me. I looked up to him, even in his down and "crazy & strange" moments. I was loyal.

Then he was just........gone. No warning, no public knowledge of an illness. Nothing. So I denied, denied, denied. "It was a sick joke like they did with Jay-Z back then" is what I told myself. He wasn't even SICK! Who goes into cardiac arrest like that w/o being sick?! Who?! Yep yep...it was a fluke.

I didn't cry at all until Friday evening when I finally got the courage to look at the Chicago Sun-Times, which on its cover, displayed several pictures of his person and included what they had known so far of his very sudden death. That's when I let it out. But only for 5 minutes.

Then it settled in on me. And I began to accept it. Death is a part of life and life breeds death. This is stuff Ive told others when they lose a loved one. However, every time it happens to me, I take it another way initially.


Michael Joe Jackson
August 29th, 1958 - June 25th, 2009

25 June 2009

Trey Day

Last Monday night, I attended Trey Songz' concert featuring Laura Izibor at the House of Bllues and was pleasantly surprised to say the least.

Unlike the fuckery that was Drake's concert a few weeks back, the Laura Izibor/Trey Songz combo was a complete difference, in only the most positive of ways. The concert started on time with Izibor opening the show and giving the crowd something to be excited about. I love her voice and compare her whole style to that of Alicia Keys. She plays the piano and has a very soulful/jazz-esque sound that I can appreciate. I was definitely pleased with the performance.

Towards the end of her number, she performed Mary J. Blige's, "Real Love", which drove the crowd INSANE! She is really talented and should NOT be slept on, people! Download her album which just dropped in May here.

The curtain closed for about 30 minutes and Trey Songz appeared on the scene. His promptness won cool points with me instantly and I wished I could just sit back and enjoy the show versus standing shoulder to shoulder with the other concertgoers. However, I wasn't complaining.

Onstage, Songz sang songs from his latest album, "Ready" which drops in August as well as select songs from his last work, "Trey Day". While singing, I was hoping against hope that he'd sing, "Role Play", which is by and large one of my favorite songs on the album. It just does hard to me. However...he never sang it. Instead, he sang other bangers like, "Missing You", "Sex For Yo Stereo", "Can't Help But Wait", and one of my favorites....."Last Time".

He even took it back and sang a hit song from his very first album, "Gotta Go" to which case he belted it out as if it was his first performance while the concertgoers crooned along with him. It was an awesome night.

What made it even more awesome was his stage presence. One thing that he did that blew me away (besides him making eye contact with me on more than one occasion-I think it was cuz height-wise I stood out from most of the girls) was his ummm "oral-sex face". He did an oral impersonation that left me stunned. I almost had to slap myself to get back on track with the concert...cuz my mind had definitely drifted lol. He also got offstage and performed in the crowd. This was short-lived, however as he was nearly raped by the females within reach and had to be pulled back onstage. Some of the women were so thirsty you could see the sand fall out of their mouths. It was ridiculous.

I will say that I completely underestimated Trey before this concert. I considered him a mildly talented singer with way too much physical appeal, which landed him "passes" in the industry. After last night's show though, my mind has changed. The kid* is an entertainer. And not only that...he's a really talented entertainer. I'm glad I was wrong, otherwise I'd have been upset that I paid for the ticket to see him.**

Other points of the night:

- A downfall of the concert was undoubtedly the "all ages welcome" for admission into the concert. With this, there were kids (literally) of all ages (literally), including a newborn child wrapped in a blanket with its mother enjoying the concert. Couldn't find a babysitter? Smh

- The attire of the concertgoers seemingly everywhere. Monday marked the first day of summer and it was HOT in Chicago (like 88 degrees outside). With that said, there were people everywhere in theee skimpiest of clothing and also the most out of date of styles. I hate trend followers and "trend-only" styles because well...they die fast. I prefer a timeless style. However, that wasn't the worst of it though. Three girls who came to the concert together were dressed from head to toe like Rihanna's clone. (By "head to toe", I mean from the hair to the makeup to the clothing to the shoes and even to the tattoos and "swag". It was weird as Hell, not to mention Rih Rih's current hair is just NOT hot. Ugh!) But anyway...

- Women fighting (literally) over things that Trey threw out to the audience. One incident was near me. He threw his sweaty towel. The towel touched my hand and some girl jumped all over my poor arm. I was rocking my specs and those few off, almost to the ground. I immediately tried to keep my distance and said girl as well as two others proceeded to fight over the towel. Security came to briefly break it up. It wasn't that serious. They can keep his sweaty towel! lol

- Women literally throwing their pantiies on the stage. Seriously. I swear I thought that the whole panty-throwing was a myth until last night. Damn, Trey...smh.

All in all though, I really enjoyed the concert. And I will be getting "Ready" when it drops (pause). Next concert is Lupe Fiasco's (yall know that's one of my FAVORITE artists, hands down!!!) at the Chicago Theatre.....but *sigh* I may not go. I've got broke friends :(. We'll see though, so stay tuned!

I've got videos and pics from Monday night stored into my phone but...they aren't the best so I won't be posting those up.

*- Trey is a year older than me. I just like to say "kid" here and there.
**- I wasn't going to go, but my homegirl is a Stan so I obliged and went. And loved the show. I'm glad I went.

17 June 2009

Revelation: Fear

I haven't really opened up about it...but it's because I am in fear.

In my life, fear seems to be the only constant or control, with everything else set as variables that are willing to change, leave, come, go and transform at the blink of an eye. With or without my consent.

P3 has been patient though, even though he knows just as well as I do that it is my fear that can cause the detriment of anything we have created thus far as well as anything that may develop for our future. I know this. I see his frustration and withdrawal which only happens as a consequence to my own balling up, shielding, and withdrawing that I do so well.

My guard is thick and hard. Still. This is a good thing as it keeps me from being naive and susceptible to a lot of situations and circumstances I could have been placed under should my walls have only been guarded by one member of security versus the system that has been set up over time: multiple armed and militant guards standing in front of several layers of fences and mass steel doors which cover a security system in-house that's more strict than Mission: Impossible.

It is easy to infer that my "mission" has become Mission: Not A Chance in Hell. So this fear--this shield has become a double-edged sword of sorts, to put it in short.

And it's all marred by the house I live in that I've not so affectionately named, "Fear". And up til now, I was fine with my place of residence. Cuz I wasn't ready to deal. I couldnt'. Wouldn't. Told myself I shadn't.

But now I think I'm ready to move. Yet, I'm very cautious to step out of the house and breath the air that awaits outside sans the guards and heightened security system. I love my protection.


It's preventing me from being able to take the risks necessary to advance past GO. I keep thinking of ways in which I'd get too comfy with the outdoors, fuck around and scrap my knee or break my leg from a "fall" and need my bed rest back into my House...rather than just "go it" and hope for the best.

I'm scared of everything. And I have yet to collect $200.00.

*For some reason, the song I put on here to support this blog wouldn't provide me with a link to paste it on here. I had Jazmine Sullivan's "Fear" in mind, though. Just act as though it's playing on this blog anyway, lol

04 June 2009

A Day in the Life...Good Samaritan/Bad Samaritan

I send Pillow* a text. It reads: "Guess who didn't know it'd rain today so she subsequently got "stuck in the rain" downtown AND fell in the rain on BOTH knees in one of her good suits?"

Rushing to work is the worst when you've gotta take two trains and walk a collective 4 blocks to get there on time. Add a downpour to that sans an umbrella and you've got yourself an even more pressing ordeal. Thank goodness for Good Samaritans.

The other day was something else. Coming out of the train station which took me from my suburb and into the heart of downtown, I really did not expect to see rain. I mean...there was no rain en route. (Or maybe I just wasnt really paying too much attention :shrugs:). As I creep out of the terminal and throw on my hooded springcoat to face the outside world which looked bleek, black, and bland, I'm interrupted by a, "let me know when you're ready". I look at the woman who is apparently talking to me.

"Oh go ahead," I respond. I think I am in her way of passing so she could exit the terminal.

"Oh I'll just wait. I've got an umbrella and I notice you don't. You going this way?" she motions straight ahead.

I pause for a half second to very quickly survey her. It is not advised to talk to random strangers, much less accept any offers of good will they may bestow. But it was raining, she offered her umbrella, and I hate getting my hair wet. I weighed out the pros and cons within that .5 second and oblige. She seemed harmless.

And my hair stayed dry all the way until..........BAM!

I fell. On BOTH knees. In one of my good suits, no less.

Now I'm 5'9", so my depth perception is typically "lower" than most people. All of a sudden, I'm on the ground, looking up and I have no clue how I got there. Now embarrassed (because I'm just too tall to be falling at random), I get up quickly and try to walk it off as if it didn't happen. Good Samaritan asks if I'm okay, while I laugh and say, "this isn't my day. I don't fall. Ever" and keep walking, still trying to ignore what just happened. Shortly after, we part ways and I thank her for being so nice.

I was on the way to an important meeting on the North side. I was incredibly early because I had no clue how long it'd take me to get from Point A to B and then finally to C (C being my final destination). Getting off of the El train I took once departing from Point B and the Good Samaritan, I spot a cab that could take me to my meeting.

I'm excited. It's raining out and even though I'm about 2 blocks away, this is two CITY blocks...which means the blocks are much longer....and must I remind you that it's RAINING! In my mind, me + walking in a downpour = no bueno.

Me: *shouting because it's raining* Good morning! I'm going to [gives address].

Bad Samaritan: *also shouting through the downpour* Okay. That's just about 2 blocks up that way *he points in the direction*

Me: Okay. It's raining. And I've got a meeting. Can you take me?

Bad Samaritan: No.

Me: *super shocked I got denied a ride by a cabdriver* Really?! Like--for real?

Bad Samaritan: Have a good day *speeds off*

Me: *now to myself like a crazy person* I mean did he just deny me a ride? Really?! It's raining!

I should have gotten his cab number. I wasnt even thinking about it at the time because that kind of stuff just has never happened to me before. I could see if it was a beautiful day outside...but it was POURING. Needless to say, I ended up walking the 2 blocks up the road and getting to my meeting extremely soaked. Thanks, Bad Samaritan. Thanks.

Lucky for me though, I got to the meeting painfully early so by the time it had started, I didn't look so terrible. (It was pure talent with the comb on my part however, because my hair was done for when I got to my destination!)