13 January 2009

PSA: To Hell with the Voyager!!!

This will just be a bit of a rant.

To Hell with the Verizon Voyger phone, yo!

(The devil in the form of a phone. smh...)

Let me tell you why I’ve damned this phone to the depths of Hell effective yesterday sometime.

So about three or four weeks ago, my then wonderful Verizon Voyager phone decided it wanted to act out. It’d occasionally cut me off in the middle of my conversations (I rarely use my phone to talk; unless it’s someone important* and opt to text more often than not), very rarely cut me off while I’m sending a text message, and cut me off while I’m on the internet. It didn’t happen too often so I dismissed it a few times. About a week and a half ago, it would not charge one day. At all. I have three phone chargers. I have a wall one, a usb charger I use with my computer, and a car charger. Not one of these chargers would help my phone. I quickly realized my phone had a major issue and took it up to the store.

When I arrive at the store, which was a major inconvenience to me and my precious time as I had a full day planned this particular Sunday, the employees assured me that the problem was that I just needed a simple software upgrade on my phone. They told me it’d take about two hours and that I’d be fine and everything would be in working order.


The process took over three hours, but I was glad to have my phone back and to its “normal self” no matter how long it took. I went home, see that my phone only has two notches of battery at this time, and attempt to charge it like normally.

There was a clear indication that my phone was “charging”, so I let it “charge” for a few hours, while I carry on about my day. (I actually left my phone at home so that it could charge fully -something I never do, by the way). I get back home after about four hours and check my phone and what do I find?

Battery Low

Powering Down

Really, Voyager?! Now I’m confused as all Hell. I say a few swear words under my breath and promise myself I’d go to the Verizon store when I get off work the next day. Needless to say, I was livid.

The next morning as I sit in my car preparing to take on the road to work, I look at my phone and plug it in the car charger so that it could get even a smigen of battery for my sake. I let it charge as the car warms up. Again, the phone shows clear indication that it is “charging” while it’s turned off. After a few minutes, I turn the phone on and it stays on for a few minutes.

Then………………………blank. It goes out. Like completely and utterly dies. Forever.

As pissed as I was, I leave that attitude alone because I had already promised myself that I’d go to the store after work.

After work, I go to the store as promised and plead my case. They hear me out, check my account, and realize I’ve had the phone for less than a year and I have phone insurance, so my phone is under a warranty which provides me with a new phone of the same make/model/etc…all for free.

Great, right?

I wait a full FIVE DAYS for my phone to get in the mail. It finally arrives and I get it programmed, make sure that all of my contacts are intact (as I am also protected with a BackUp Plan which reserves all of my contacts in the event my phone dies for no reason at all. Everything is in working order.

This was last Friday night. Like the Friday that just passed.

Today is Tuesday.

That’s 3 and a half days ago. Last night, as I’m sitting watching the Real Chance of Love Finale (which pissed me off in sooooooooo many ways, by the way), my new phone decides to play Peek-A-Boo on ya girl yet again.

New phone. Same problem. This can’t be life.

It cuts off. Doesn’t charge, blah blah.

I will be heading my tail back to the store once I leave work (which should be very soon) and this time, I’m telling them that I will NOT take another Verizon Voyager because that phone is “defective as Hell” © my homegirl Crystal.

What do I want?

I want the BlackberryStorm.

And I want it for free!

The end.

Phoneless in Chi…kinda,


* important people = fam, close friends, business folk....or if the subject matter is pressing. Everyone else? Text me. Thanks :)


Stefan said...

Somehow I knew this story would end with BlackBerry. lol

Eb the Celeb said...


Why the hell am I going threw the same thing with mine right now... I cant really complain because I've had my phone for a while... I got it as soon as it came out... but my phone wont change either... I have insurance so they are going to replace it but I just left the one closest to me and they were out of stock... now I have to go out my way... all the way to the other side of the city where they are holding one for me.

Ms_Slim said...

Stef: Shut up. Thanks :)

Eb: Did I forget to mention that I got the Voyager dang near as fast as it dropped too? That means that we both dropped a near FOUR STACKS on this phone. Why can't you complain?! With the amount of money spent on this obvious piece of trash, one would believe that it be on its regenerating-and virtually unbreakable-Terminator circa 2029 shyt, no? And since you've had an issue as well, how bout we do some kinda petition for this phone. Get it recalled and all sufferers be granted the Blackberry Storm as a compensation for their distress. Great idea, yes? :)

Anonymous said...

Your writing is terrible.

Ms_Slim said...

Anon: HA! Okaaaay. Here's a thought: How bout you click that little box at the upper right hand corner of your screen and opt not to read my stuff? Deal? I mean, I didnt ask you to come, right? Yet you're here reading (I assume you've been reading me awhile) and even left a comment. Like my homie Teef said: "(You're the) type nigga to go to the club and talk about how much he hates it the whole time he's there...take your simple ass home, fam." Have a good day. Oh...and don't come back here with all that negativity 'round here, ya hear? Take care, now....bye bye! :)

Kofi Bofah said...

U Mad?

I am on my 6th VZ Chocolate phone right now.

Ms_Slim said...

Kofi: Moreso frustrated than anything else. You're on your SIXTH phone?! Can't say that that could be me lol. Me and patience dont really go hand in hand with such things. I should be getting another phone (my third Voyager, smh) sometime today. If this one goes down, I'm not doing another Voyager. Like I said...next stop will be the BB Storm lol

Kofi Bofah said...

I am not too big into tech.

If it can make calls - I am good.

I don't need to turn the thing into a space ship and fly to the moon with it like these new fangled phones are promising today...